What About Evs?
by Eternal Love LJ
Summary: James pointlessly flirting with Lily. [OneShot]


**Disclaimer: Don't own Lily Evans, James Potter, or Harry Potter, or anything involved with anything that has to do with these made up fictional characters who rock my world. Okay?**

** What About . . . Evs? **

"I love the way your hair flows in the wind," James said seductively to Lily.

"What the hell? Potter, go away," Lily said, shaking her head as she worked on her essay for Transfiguration.

"Your lips are luscious like dessert," James smiled cockily.

"Doing my _essay_!" Lily said.

"Your eyes are greener than my boxers," James said loudly.

"Get the frig away from me!" Lily yelled.

"Wanna see?" James asked.

"You sick pervert! Go do a cow!"

"_I'm_ the sick pervert . . . wait. What's a cow?" James asked.

Lily shook her head again. "Potter, don't you have pranks to plan or kids to scare?"

"Kids scaring doesn't start until 6:35," James replied smartly. "Prank planning starts at promptly 9:23."

"Right," Lily nodded. "Why don't you go bug McGonagall or something?"

"I like bugging you more."

"That's too damn bad for you."

"Will you go to the loo with me?" he asked romantically.

"You want me to go to the _loo_ with you?" she asked, taken aback.

"Where else would I want to go with you?" he asked.

"Hogsmeade? Your pants? Your dorm?" Lily offered.

"Why, I'd love to, Lily! I didn't know you were so _eager_!" James giggled.

"Potter . . . go away."

"Why don't we share a romantic evening by the lake looking up at the stars?" James asked. "Star gazing!"

"Looking at the stars while star gazing? Well, Potter, I don't know if I can multi-task like that," Lily rolled her eyes.

"Sexy _and_ funny!" James laughed, "Triple threat!"

"Triple? Potter, triple is _three_."

"Brains," James said as though it were obvious, "Duh!"

"Potter, why don't you go learn your multiplication tables or do something productive?"

"Wanna reproduce?" James asked.

"NO!" Lily shouted, "Go away!"

"You can't just _order_ your problems away, Lils," James said, "You have to deal with them."

"Call me 'Lils' again and you can say goodbye to your family jewels," Lily replied.

"Lily?"

"Evans," Lily corrected him.

"What's your middle name?"

"Mackenzie."

"Can I call you Mack?"

"And live? No."

"Drat!" James said. "What about . . . Evs?"

"Evs?" Lily asked.

"Yeah. It's short for . . . Evans . . . you know?" he said nervously.

"Right. Potter, you're scaring me."

"What about Lil?"

"What about Evans?"

"You can call me James. Hell, you can call me Jamie. And I don't say that to everyone," James nodded.

"Wow, I feel special," Lily said sarcastically.

"You should," James grinned. "Evs."

"Bloody hell, go away!"

"So . . . maybe you'll come visit me in my dorm tonight . . ."

"Maybe I'll _murder_ you _right now_!" Lily said angrily.

"That wouldn't be very fun," James frowned.

"I don't find your dorm all that amusing either."

"I'd probably find yours rather captivating."

"Too bad, hah?" Lily said. "Now, leave me to my essay."

"What essay?" James asked.

"The Transfiguration essay due tomorrow."

"Oh! No way! Lily Evans . . . I mean _Evs_ . . . left her essay for the last minute! What's to become of us!"

"Shut up, Potter. Is _your_ essay done?" she asked.

"Yes, it is, in fact," James said cockily. "It's on Animagi . . . and I know that topic pretty well."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really. I spent years studying it."

Lily rolled her eyes. "I'm sure."

"Wanna make out?"

"No!"

"You sure?"

"Yes!"

"Cool, let's do it," James said.

"What?"

"You said 'yes'."

"GO AWAY!"

"You know you love me."

"No, I really don't."

"Do you hate me?"

"No."

"Really?" James asked happily.

"No, I don't hate you," Lily shook her head. "Much."

"Seriously, Evs, do you?"

"When you call me 'Evs', I sure do!"

"Sorry, Lils."

"OH MY GOD!"

"What?"

"Shut up!"

"You _so_ like me," James gushed.

"Oh, shut up."

"I'll take that as a yes."

**A/N: I hope you liked it! I thought it was a little funny and cute so I decided to post it! I hope that you like it!**

** Read/Review if you feel like it!**

**Love,  
-- Eternal Love LJ  
**


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